What kind of person am I? Seriously? What defines me as a person? Almost all my friends have a particular talent of their own that somewhat defines them. I have my artistic friends, musical friends, athletic friends, intelligent friends. . . Where do I fall in? Am I doomed to be the average? The one who makes up like 60% of the population? I don't know. I've made my forays into those areas and each time I manage to come up short. Guitar and harmonica were both failures as far as I'm concerned. I never learned more than the basic basics. Art has never been my thing at all so I can't really say I've tried in that. As far as academics, it seems like my time at that has passed. I think I peaked academically somewhere in the sixth grade. From there, I kinda just used what natural intelligence I had to coast through school. I'm not saying it worked, seeing as my highest high school G.P.A. was 2.5-__-. Now that I'm in college, I'm kicking myself mentally for not paying more attention in my English and Math classes.
In terms of athletics, I never quite made it there either. Tennis was my sport for a little while until I eventually lost interest for it. I picked up basketball about 3 years ago now and while I've managed to come a long way, I seem to have plateaued at being below average.

I don't know, it seems like a lot of these things are my own fault but I don't know. I don't even know what makes me me. Especially after today. I feel like now I just come off as an immature asshole with no redeeming qualities. I don't even feel like it would be possible for me to have a life changing epiphany. I think I think waay too much for that.

so i played this dude 21 just us two. surprisingly enough my 3 was falling. i swear its the shoes. i wonder what im gonna do with my life. my old mental images of what city life would be like are solwly fading. i love the shot from the opening credits of monk with him walking accross the st with the fog. idk. if i had an apartment, it would be filled with ikea shit.

^^^^^^^^^

word vomit -__-

So basically, im in a funk. again. times like this, i wish i could go hoop @ ac or something. im tired of people and obligations and failure. maybe i should throw myself into work andscool. maybe throw in some exercise too.